Survey Reveals Japanese People Are Tired of Marriage Hunting
A new survey has revealed a troubling fact about relationships in Japan: fatigue from marriage hunting is already affecting the majority of single people trying to find a partner.
The survey was conducted by SMBC Consumer Finance and analyzed single men and women between the ages of 25 and 39 who actively participate in so-called konkatsu, a term used to describe the active search for marriage.
According to the data, 80.6% of respondents said they feel emotionally exhausted while trying to find someone to marry. Among men, the figure reaches 74.4%, while among women it rises to an impressive 86.8%, meaning that nearly nine out of ten women are tired of the process.
Survey Reveals Japanese People Are Tired of Marriage Hunting
The study shows that this exhaustion from marriage hunting does not arise by chance. One of the main reasons cited by participants is the difficulty of finding someone who meets their personal expectations. About 43% of men and 60% of women said they simply cannot meet people who match the criteria they are looking for.
Even when that happens, the problem continues. Approximately 42% of men and 46% of women reported that when they do find someone compatible, the interest is not reciprocated. In other words, mutual attraction between two people ends up being rare within konkatsu.
In practice, this creates a draining cycle: meeting someone, feeling frustrated, trying again, and repeating the process countless times without concrete results. Over time, emotional exhaustion becomes inevitable.
Experts who commented on the survey results highlight an important point. When researching reports about marriage-hunting fatigue in Japan, it is easy to find thousands of similar stories, pieces of advice, and even advertisements for services promising to solve the problem. However, there is a difficult reality to ignore.
If more than 80% of people involved in the search for marriage are exhausted, it means that most encounters occur between people who are already emotionally worn out. Exhausted people tend to connect with others who are equally exhausted, which further reduces the chances of forming a genuine bond.
Another factor identified as central is the so-called “paradox of choice.” The greater the number of available options, the harder it becomes to make a decision. Many singles enter konkatsu believing there will always be someone better just around the corner, which delays decisions and deepens emotional fatigue.
Experts do not claim that konkatsu is useless, but they suggest that marriages that succeed within this system usually involve people who are able to commit before reaching this level of burnout. In other words, those who get tired less tend to be more successful.
Finally, the study notes that the term konkatsu began to gain popularity around 2010, and since then fatigue related to marriage hunting in Japan has only increased. This raises an uncomfortable question: perhaps the very model of actively searching for marriage, as practiced today, contributes to exhaustion and to the prolonged single life in the country.